Third Day- April 22nd 2011

Third day aboard April 22^nd, 2011

                Today was roughly easy in terms of crew duties.  It was an entire sea day en route from the Grand Turk to Miami.  I woke up around 11:00 for the “Legends” show rehearsal fully expecting a stage manager, or someone to lead the rehearsal not to mention that the show “Legends” is an actual show with dancers and everyone.  Not quite.  As it turns out, “Legends” is basically a beefed up karaoke show in which the actors were picked from the guests.  Each guest sang a song from a performer from the 1990s.  There was Britney Spears, Garth Brooks, and some older tunes from Elton John and Ricky Martin and some others.  The show wasn’t very complicated but the singers were very, very, very bad.  Apparently none of them knew how to sing.  David, Jayson and I sat in the booth observing the rehearsal which consisted of the performer singing their song with the band without lights.  I needed some booze to get through this one.  The performers were also interesting to watch.  Each was very different from the last and you could tell which ones had some stage experience and which didn’t.   My favorite was the Britney Spears chick.  She was definitely a trophy wife with big long blond hair and a really low cut shirt.  Of course, her song was Hit Me Baby, One More Time.  Gawd, it was awful.  She basically just stood there with her hands on her hips and went through the motions of the song.  Believe it or not, Snooki was also on this cruise (or at least her look alike).  I can’t remember what she sang, but she even had some floor “dancing” too.  It was better than “Spears” but not by much.  Next was, Franklin with “Respect.”  This girl could actually sing and was one of the best singers of the show, but she had a little pooch or beer gut or something and wore a tight dress so it bounced every time she moved.  Not bad though.  Next was Elton John singing “Crocodile Rock.” It was pretty much the straightest, body builder out there.  He was so buff that he walked like a gorilla (like my gym teacher in high school).  I honestly laughed so hard not because he couldn’t sing at all but because the way he walked.  After the rehearsal which lasted about an hour and a half they pretty much didn’t need me.  Since it was our last day at sea before Miami they had a lot of other things planned but just not in that space.   My next call time was 10 pm.  That gave me pretty much the entire day to myself.  I got some lunch at the crew mess after the rehearsal and then moved back to my room just to chill for a while.  By the time I got back it was about 3 o’clock so I had plenty of time to kill before my call at 10.  I just relaxed and watched “Charlie Wilson’s War” on my computer for a while then moved on to Red Alert (the first and very old one).  I played a couple of missions then got tired of the old and outdated graphics so I moved on to the second Red Alert.  I played a couple of missions of that and got a phone call from the room phone.  Apparently my reimbursement for the taxi was approved and I needed to pick it up from MSA between 4 and 6.  Right after the phone call I must have fallen asleep because a whole hour passed before I went down to MSA to pick up the cash.  All the transactions here on ship are done in cash.  Down at the office I noticed one of the ship’s officers (or at least crew) in the typical white shirt and pants at the desk.  Apparently he needed to get a safety deposit box or something.  All I remember is that the MSA officer needed over a grand for some fee, or he was storing some cash, or whatever.  I just remember the officer plunking down over a thousand dollars right next to me like it was nothing.  The MSA officer counted it all back and put it in a desk right beside her chair.  I was kinda shocked to see over a thousand dollars just sitting on the table next to me but it didn’t even phase either officer.  All I was here for was a measly 22 bucks for the taxi from the airport.  I picked up my cash and went back to my room.  I ate dinner at 6 then headed to the theater to prepare for the “Legends” show.  We got all the equipment set up and ran the show as usual.  I still can’t get used to the fact that the cues go without anyone calling them.  One thing that my trainers failed to mention was that the “singers” had their own costumes.  Most of them were as cliché as anything else, but it worked for the show.  Britney Spears had a blonde wig put in pig tales a white dress shirt that was tied up from the waist and a plaid miniskirt fitting for her “Hit Me Baby One More Time” disaster.  All the other dancers danced around her as if she was recording a music video, and they looked pretty nice all were in a similar getup.  The show proceeded through the various dancers including “Respect.”  She had a pretty good show, but still they put her in a black fitted night dress and all I could see was her beer gut bouncing up and down as she sang, but still, not a bad singer.  Next was Elton John.  I almost didn’t want to watch… Almost.  I could almost see the costume in my head, a pink boa with rainbow sunglasses?  A guy in a rainbow dress? Actually, it was just a simple white suit with over emphasized lapels a giant white “pimp” fedora and a white boa.  Not too bad.  It was comical to see a guy with such big biceps in a small costume.  One thing that I noticed with the lights: every time “Elton” came to the refrain of the Rock there were about 6 movers that flashed pink triangles and spun them around the singer.  A subtle touch for the people who paid attention in lighting class.  Pink triangles meet gay Elton John? Nice connection.  Something that I didn’t see in Rehearsal was Jen the Cruise Director added filler sections as singers were making their costume changes.  She came out halfway dressed as Dolly Parton complete with huge fake boobies and a horrible blonde wig as she chased dancers around the stage.  It was the most enjoyable part of the show.  (What is that music that you see in comedy shows where someone is trying to catch someone and they constantly miss?  I could imagine that being played as she chased them) She ran around the stage chasing the dancers who were dressed up like sexy cowboys pretending to fall all over them and make out with them (95% of the dancers are gay—obviously).  Maybe that was the part that made it so funny.  After the performers took their final bow I managed to remember how to turn everything off and went back to my room to freshen up.  I couldn’t decide to go to the bar or to stay in the room and just chill for a while.  By this time, it was around midnight and I didn’t feel like going to the bar if they closed an hour and a half from then but I went anyway to see if anyone was around and willing to chitchat.  I popped my head in the bar and didn’t see anyone I recognized and, not wanting to be social, went back upstairs.  Daniel came in and I checked with him to see if he wanted to go to the bar (it’s easier if there is someone with you) but he didn’t want to go so I turned in for the night.